Sunday, January 17, 2016

Life seemed really short lately, I was thinking this because, I wished I had more time with my brother Ceasar Larry, he has joined our mother, cousins, Uncles and friends. In the spirit world, where I hope to one day join too. Heaven that is. I miss him so much right now, and all the memory that I can remember is coming back to me, of when we spend time together. He was a protector, a friend and a brother to me. I miss his laugh, it was between a cough and a laugh. He wasn't afraid of most things and went out to get things he wanted, and he believe in himself. Everyone knows how smart he was, he could quote sentences of books he read. Sometimes his mind would wonder, I love the man he was. Ceasar as he renamed himself, was mostly a happy carefree man. You could even see it in his walk arms swinging from his body.  He was what a big brother should be, and I loved him for it. Well Ceasar Larry Adams miss you much, remember forever. Love your little sister.

Thursday, January 14, 2016

                                                                 I AM


             I am a glowing Sun
                      Own my on Power
                               From GOD

             My spirit is Huge
                      It fills up all dark places
                              If you could see what I really looked like
                                 Your eyes couldn't contain the brightness

                                                     The Lightness
                                                              The Joy
                                                                   The Love

I hold within me
          Parts and pieces of the World
                      I have drops of every human that ever lived and will ever be born
Within me
In my heart are tears of pain and joy
                  And when it is broken, it mends and waits to love again

Never is it all the way broken, because Love is what it's made of
That Love comes from My God, my Lord
He is Love an I am his child
I am

by Cynthia B. Williams August 27 2015

Monday, January 11, 2016

Sitting here trying to see if I like, that someone I love do not have any goals, just want to be.  I have dreams, dreams to one day see the Ocean in person. Dreams of owning a house maybe, dreams of maybe owning my own store to sell my crafts.  Goals to lose weight or just get better. Goals of writing more stories and getting them published. I don't know if I want to be with someone who has no goals or dreams at all.  I mean if you stop dreaming, then you just like things as they are, maybe some may said that's great for them, but we are a little too different can we get alone. I quess if they are at home taking care of the house and I am out trying to make my dreams come true, isn't that going to get old for me or not.  Just thinking online or out
loud.

Saturday, January 9, 2016

What to do?

What do you do, when your heart said yes, but your mind said no.  If it is  better to have things and what they can buy, or the love you have been looking for. I am so in the middle of this I don't know what the future holds for this relationship. Do I have a conversation about how they need to have goals, to work and be able to support themselves as well as help support me, or at lease be able to help me with things I need. And if they don't should I go ahead and run from this relationship.
I know seems really easy. He makes me feel loved, like a Queen, and , and sweet, I loved just sitting with him and talking. So because he doesn't have much should I leave him be. What and find a man with money who will care for my needs. Money or Love what to chose.